I realized this week that I will need to learn to be more comfortable living as a boiling pot of water. “What do you mean?” you ask. Well I use this analogy because, it finally happened this week. I broke down in a meeting for no good reason. I knew the tears were inevitable and just sitting back waiting for the right moment to decide to show. I could feel it bubbling up but, I just couldn’t think of a good reason to excuse myself. I tried drinking water, etc. but – it was inevitable. Lucky, for me it was just “us girls.” Mostly, I think it was as a result of having a minute to just sit and think...I have been so busy up until that moment there hasn't been an opportunity for me to reflect on everything.
Up until this point in my life I felt like I had managed stress, motherhood, being a wife ok – even sometimes well. I have realized that before now I was a pot of water – but probably on medium with no cover. Now, I am a pot of water still on medium but, someone has placed the cover on that pot. Result: the occasional moments where I bubble up enough that something has to spill over to make sure the majority of me stays upright. I know as we figure out what this new life means to us and begin to feel the ground under our feet again -- it will get easier.
For now, I am fortunate enough to have a boss that understands me and knows that my random ‘emotional-ness’ is not due to work specifically but, really figuring out how to adjust to this new path.
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